I recently read a wonderful quote by Elisabeth Elliot in her book, Keep a Quiet Heart. If you’re not familiar with her, I encourage you to research her story. It’s incredible. This amazing lady endured much heartache and loss, yet she continually turned her heart to God.
Lord, give to me a quiet heart
That does not ask to understand,
But confident steps forward in
The darkness guided by Thy hand.
Elisabeth Elliot
For much of my life I have been chastised for “wearing my heart on my sleeve” when wounded by the words or actions of others. It’s not something I try to do, it’s just the way I am. Some say I am too sensitive. I say I care too much. Over the years I learned to internalize those hurts rather than show them. I look fine, but inside I’m breaking. The quiet heart Elisabeth Elliot speaks of often eludes me. As I look at her quote, I realize it eluded her as well; her wounds and tragedies brought her to her knees as she prayed for a quiet heart.
I spend a great deal of time and energy replaying hurtful situations in my mind, trying to understand what happened so I can avoid the same pain in the future. Sometimes I understand. Sometimes I don’t. My confidence begins to falter and my self-esteem takes a dive. But, as I said, I keep the pain inside. I have a sensitive heart and a stoic demeanor. No one can see my pain.
As I turn to the book of Proverbs in the Bible, my eyes fall on a passage of great wisdom.
Trust in and rely confidently on the Lord with all your heart and do not rely on your own insight or understanding. In all your ways know and acknowledge and recognize Him, and He will make your paths straight and smooth [removing obstacles that block your way]. – Proverbs 3:5-6 (AMP)
I know God has a plan. He wants me to trust His way, rather than try to determine my own path. I belong to Him. My heart is quieted as I rest safely in the arms of the One who loves me most.
Simple Faith 
Deanna, you have shared such essential understanding of why we want to understand: to protect ourselves from more harm. I have the same self-protective strategy. “Figure it out and I’ll also know what to do next time to protect myself!” I learned it early in life and thought it should work. For a long time God has been faithfully and persistently been dealing with those lies. We are fellow journey-ers in this challenge, Deanna. I don’t think we’re alone. Thank you for sharing!!!!!
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